July 11th

This is just one of many “blurt-outs” about my very teenage life, so brace yourself.

I think when girls are young they see Prince Charming on TV or something and have this longing to be wanted by someone so bad. Regardless of how this person pursues her, in a little girl’s mind it only matters that she’s being pursued.

I’m not so little anymore, yet I have only recently realized that I should hold a certain standard for any person that claims to want to be with me. I’m not saying I didn’t have boundaries. I have the typical boundaries any teen girl would have: Don’t be an asshole, don’t be rude to the people I care about, occasionally take me out on a date, etc.

I’ve recently learned, however, someone can be so in love with you (and you love them back), treat you as if you are their entire world, take you out on dates, make you laugh, laugh at your jokes, practically travel all throughout Italy with, yet still not be for you.

Why you may ask? Because there’s a difference between wanting someone for real and only wanting them because you can’t have them.

There’s this weird thing about guys: sort of like a kid in a candy shop, but with no money. When someone can’t have you and they spend nearly a year pining after you in hopes that you will take them up on their offer, once they do finally get what they want, yeah, they’ll be great. They’ll check all of those boxes off until that longing for you dies.

As a victim of this (numerous times), I recommend you to shut the door on this person. Leaving and coming back only gives them that feeling of newness and wanting that they crave, but it’s not real love. If they really cared about you, they wouldn’t get sick of you. They wouldn’t walk away again in the midst of the laughter.